Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

22 Dec

What’s New with Me

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , .

So much has happened in my life since I was really active here on the blog. I haven’t written a lot about my second child, but I was just re-reading some of my old posts about my struggles with infertility, and it’s worth mentioning that I have two beautiful children now. They are ages 7 and 21. I often joke that it’s natural child spacing at its quirkiest–and best. They are both precious people and I’m so glad I get to be their mom.

In other news, we had a big move earlier this year. We moved from a small town (population 250) in a rural part of Texas to a much bigger small town in the outer suburbs of San Antonio. It’s funny because I run into people who are from major cities and they think of our current suburb as a “small town,” but having come here from a tiny town, I look at our bustling suburb with wide eyes and think, “We’re in the city now!”

Suburban life is a sweet spot for me. I grew up in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio. And I loved having wide open countryside nearby while also not being far at all from the really big city. And of all the cities in Texas, San Antonio is my favorite. So, as far as I’m concerned, we could retire in this big small town we’re in right now and I’d be delighted.

Our move was prompted by my husband, David’s recent change of jobs. He is now pastoring a church out in the country near this town we call home. The setting of the church is ideal because Dave gets to pastor a rural congregation–which he is so well suited for, and we get to live in the suburbs which works well for the kids and me.

Our new church is a delightful community of people. They have welcomed all of us with such warmth. It’s been really good for my soul to be among them. I feel like I get to be more myself at this church than I have felt I could be in many previous churches.

This move in general has been really good for me. I even found a job that I love. I’m working part time at an art store that doubles as a walk-in art studio. So much of my experience in making art has come in so useful in my new role there. I’ve only been there three months, but I already feel like I’m part of really good team of co-workers and I love having so many opportunities to share the joy of creating with our customers.

I’m still toying with the idea of going back to school. But given the number of times I’ve made announcements on the blog about what I might be doing in that regard, I’m loath to update y’all on that until I actually have something concrete to report.

So that’s all the news for now.

God be with you all this Christmas and may you be blessed in the new year!

28 Apr

Creating Words

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Uncategorized.

I’ve been getting up early in the morning to write. And I like it.

This is big. Really big. I’ve been a nite owl–thought to be incurable–for nearly all my life.

I never knew I could be the kind of person to enjoy mornings so much, but I do. I love the morning now. I love being awake before everyone else and doing my own thing for a spell.

More specifically, I like the feeling of purpose that getting up to write gives me. I have so many words–oh so many–and I want them live somewhere. So getting up to write gives me that sense of honoring myself by giving my words a place to exist, to be free, to have their day in the sun. Well, not literally in the sun because the sun isn’t out yet. It’s just an expression, you know?

I’m working to add other times during my day to write too because, like I say–oh so many words. I have stories and prose and poems and songs that all clamor to emerge to the light, and I’m committed to giving them each their day.

I don’t know if I could enumerate all the works I have considered writing. Even those I have determined I will certainly write is a vast number. Oh so many words, and oh so many works.

There’s a hymn called, “How Great Thou Art,” that has a line that says, “When I in awesome wonder, consider all the works thy hand hath made…” (emphasis mine). And in the hymnal I grew up using, there was an asterisk by “works,” that led to a note, saying, “or worlds.”

I’ve always had a little fascination with this, but never researched it. Somehow I’ve just always intuited that it makes sense that these could be interchangeable because a big part of God’s work is that of creating worlds. Noteworthy too is that God used words to speak worlds into existence.

I told someone on a recent evening that I was getting up early the next morning. They asked me whether I had to work. Without stopping to explain that I would be writing and I was between paid gigs, I simply said, “yes.” It felt good to recognize my writing as work. I am, after all, creating worlds with my words.

23 Aug

I Don’t Drink, Don’t Smoke…but Not Why You Think

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Brokenness, Family, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , .

I’m not a big drinker and I’ve never tried so much as a puff of a cigarette. I haven’t said much about all this because what I have come to see is that my Position on drinking and smoking is less about Principle and more about Propensities.

To put it another way, I don’t drink much or smoke at all because I think if I did more of the one and even tried the other, well, I think I’d like it. Too much.

What I share here as to my reasons is very personal and not meant to point a finger at anyone else. For all I know, I’m the only person who’s had such little experience with substances yet craves them something fierce.

Somehow though, I keep feeling like it is something I need (want?) to share. And, you know, I’m on the internet now and my life is an open book anyway.

Over time I have had Good Reasons not to Do Substances. When I was underage, both were, of course, Illegal. As I dabbled in fundamentalist Christian thought, it was rather convenient to forego these substances because I was taught they were Sinful. And regardless of one’s age there are certainly Risks involved.

But those Reasons have faded over time. I’m old enough now that they are Legal, I no longer universally see their use as a Sin Issue, and I know plenty of people who are relatively Responsible about occasional enjoyment of these substances from time to time.

What remains for me personally a Stumbling Block about drinking and smoking though is the Addictive Nature of alcohol and tobacco because I sense in my body the very real and present possibility of Getting Hooked.

I have just enough sorrows that are just enough exacerbated by my stupid depression that I want to Drown Them All. Alcohol especially would be soooo easy…so easy.

My husband picked up a case of beer the other day and he put a few bottles in the fridge.

High Life?

Every time I so much as see the bottles there when I open the fridge, I feel a rush, a craving, a longing…a desire to Drown All The Everything. I want to grab a bottle and feel it course through me.

But I know me…and I know that times I’ve given into that a little, I’ve wanted to keep giving into it.

In this one area of my life, my tendency to Think Too Much has been a benefit to me. My self-awareness of how much I want to indulge has always nagged me enough to stop drinking before I’ve had too many and not even try smoking.

This part is delicate, so I want to tread lightly here, but I also have family history that stands as a warning sign to me. I know that these Propensities can run in families, so I have been especially Vigilant in my own life.

I don’t claim some moral high ground for my choices in these matters. If anything, I feel somehow weaker than others that I can’t just have one drink without Overthinking Every Sip.

But knowledge is power, and I do indeed know myself on this matter which is why I don’t drink and I don’t smoke.