7 Apr

I Used to Go Barefoot

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Community. Tagged: , .

20130407-010121.jpgChildhood friends have a way of grounding me, of reminding me of things about myself that make me who I am. Sometimes they remember the strangest things though, things I would never have imagined would make a lasting impression.

A childhood friend just reminded me that I used to go barefoot. She and her sister (both of them younger than me) lived directly across the street from me when we were kids. She recalled how I would cross that pebbly street in my bare feet to go over and play. She still marvels at how those pebbles didn’t seem to bother me.

It’s true, I used to go barefoot. Even as a toddler my mother says she couldn’t keep shoes and socks on me. Throughout my childhood I only put something on my feet when I absolutely had to (no shoes, no service).

In the summer, the days were full with playing and we didn’t have to go anywhere besides each other’s houses. Whole days would go by without anything on my feet at all. By the end of the day the soles of my feet were filthy, dark as coal. I didn’t mind.

As a grown-up, I don’t go barefoot as much. I like my feet to breath though, so prefer sandals when it’s warm enough. If I go too long with shoes and socks on, my feet scream at me to let them free.

I want to be remembered for the Important Things, but going barefoot is such a trivial thing to be remembered for. She is right though, and that thread runs all through my life.

Remembering it fills me with delight. Yes, sweet friend, I used to go barefoot.

5 Apr

Is it Really Good Enough?

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Brokenness, Community. Tagged: , , , , , .

Yesterday my friend Sarah Bessey shared a link to a guest post by Tara Livesay over at D.L. Mayfield’s blog. In the post Tara Livesay talks about her life in Haiti and her concern about visitors who come for mission trips.

Tara laments the tendency of visitors to view themselves as the heroes and to look at the people of Haiti as “projects.” She writes about the air of superiority and even the disdain with which some visitors view the people of Haiti.

Tara says,

It is not at all unusual to hear visitors botch something up they are working on and say, “Oh well, it is good enough for Haiti.”

That post hit me right between the eyes, because I was one of those visitors. When I was 17 years old (over half my lifetime ago), I went on a week-long mission trip to Haiti.

I know I went there thinking I was going to be a hero. The real truth of that trip is that the people of Haiti made more of an impact on me than I did on them.

When it came down to it, I avoided the hardest work projects because they were too hard. Even when I did help out with doable things, I remember just feeling hot all the time.

My half-baked efforts were far from “good enough for Haiti.” The “project” was too much for me. I failed it.

The only good I did in Haiti was when I joined in their singing. I was terrible at it because I was unsure of the words, their meaning and their pronunciation.

20130405-160409.jpgWhen we gathered with Hatian churches or Haitian school children, there was so much singing. Their singing was so joyful, so exuberant. They knew the words even if I didn’t.

I eeked out the words the best I could manage. And the best thing about singing with them was that it was with them. It wasn’t something I did for them because I was better. It was something we did together.

I still remember some of those songs and I still sing them from time to time. It is part of the lasting impact that the people of Haiti have had on me.

Still, I think part of me has carried a sense of failure that I didn’t make the impact on Haiti that I intended.

My son was in public school when Haiti had been devastated by the earthquake. So I dusted off my photo album from Haiti, made a slide show and spoke to my son’s class. I wanted to do something helpful, to Raise Awareness.

Now though, after reading Tara Livesay’s post I wonder if my little talk only perpetuated the “we as heroes” narrative. Did I use that opportunity to make up for my failure at the “project” earlier in my life?

I started writing this post last night before I went to bed and I have been mulling it over all day. I want to be able to wrap it up in some meaningful conclusion. I can’t seem to do it though because Tara’s post has left me with more questions than answers.

Could it be that is a good thing?

2 Apr

The Teacher Who Showed Us Jesus and Gave Us a Conscience

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Community, Inspiration. Tagged: , , , , .

20130401-183713.jpg

Welcome to “Tuesday Tributes,” a new series here on the blog. The series is about lifting up people who have impacted our lives. They may be our teachers, neighbors, parents, friends, or mentors.

Each Tuesday I will share a story about someone who has inspired me, mentored me in the faith, or shaped my character. Then you can tell your stories in the comments about someone who has impacted you in a similar way.

Today’s tribute is about Mrs. Bricker who was my 5th grade teacher.

How do public school teachers manage to remain faithful to Christ when they are not supposed to invoke his name in the classroom? If Christians are to be light to the world, how much are public school teachers allowed to shine before administration tells them to hide it under a bushel?

I don’t know if Mrs. Bricker ever told us she was a Christian that year, but when I found that out it was not a surprise to me. She probably wasn’t supposed to talk about such things, but even without talking about Jesus, she showed us his love.

Mrs. Bricker worked with us to write our own class rules. She encouraged us to think out-loud together about the importance of respecting one another.

She modeled respect in how she treated each one of us. She never raised her voice. She didn’t have to because we respected her.

When we misbehaved for other teachers, Mrs. Bricker corrected us calmly. She was clear that we had messed up, but her kindness gave us hope that we could do better.

Toward the end of the year Mrs. Bricker taught us a poem that she memorized in school. It was called, “Myself” and the author wrote about wanting to make choices that he could live with. Mrs. Bricker told us that these words had always stuck with her and made her think of the choices she made in life.

Each of us was required to recite the poem aloud to the class. We didn’t have to memorize it but I have always remembered the lessons she taught us with it.

The last couple of lines always stuck with me,

Whatever happens I want to be

Self respecting and conscience free.

I felt inspired by this idea of behaving in ways that would leave me with a clean conscience. The poem resonated with me all the more because Mrs. Bricker showed us what it looked like to live that way.

Like I say, Mrs. Bricker didn’t cross any lines separating church and state. She simply showed us Jesus by respecting us, and teaching us to respect one another. I believe she was Jesus to us when she gave us dignity even when we did undignified things. Through modeling “conscience free” living, she was pointing us to God’s better way for our lives.

When I speak to groups about living out their faith in their everyday lives, inevitably someone raises the question of “what if my job won’t let me talk about Jesus?” I think of people in my life like Mrs. Bricker and I tell them you do it by showing them the love of Jesus through your love and respect for them.

What about you? Do you recall teachers who both gave and received respect in the classroom? Who has helped shape your character or conscience? Who in your life has shown you the love of Jesus in how they have treated you?

31 Mar

Resurrection Day Greetings!

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Inspiration. Tagged: , , , .

Christ is Risen!
May the Good News of the Resurrection of Our Lord fill you with joy! Alleluia!

30 Mar

This is the Night!

Posted by Jennifer Clark Tinker in Inspiration. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , .

20130330-134619.jpgI know I’ve said before that I love the church and I love being part of what God is doing in and through the church. If I am honest though, there are some things I love about church more than others. One of my really favorite things about church is this night–the eve of our celebration of the resurrection.

One of the names for this night is “Holy Saturday” and on this night many Christians gather to keep vigil for the resurrection of Jesus.

I realize how odd it sounds to talk about keeping vigil for the resurrection because we as Christians already know the “rest of the story.” I go to church three nights in a row: Maundy Thursday, Good Friday and Holy Saturday. Each service lets me dwell on some part of the story so I can contemplate its significance. Yes, we know how the story ends, but it is important to keep telling/hearing the story.

This night, this Holy Saturday, I will be at my church’s vigil. It is my favorite church service of the entire year. I love the vigil more than Easter Sunday.

Another blogger that I follow, Jessica, over at Bohemian Bowmans, wrote her perspective on why she doesn’t like Easter. She mentions her generation (she’s a Millennial, I’m at the tail end of Generation X) and their distrust of things that feel contrived. She writes,

I would MUCH rather stay home for Easter Sunday to meditate and reflect on the “reason for the season”.

Honestly, if I stayed home I would probably just sleep and not do anything very meditative at all. Still, her point about meditating and reflecting on what it is all about it gets at why I like the vigil even more than Easter Sunday itself.

At the vigil we light candles and slow down for a while. We hear the Old Testament stories of how God has been at work throughout all of human history. We get to see the broad strokes of our salvation history. We get to make connections between the Old Testament stories and the Jesus story.

Then, at the culmination of the vigil, we get to hear the resurrection story, having been reminded of its full context. When the Good News of the resurrection is announced I feel like we at the vigil are the first ones to the empty tomb. Our subdued and somber voices break out with the first proclamation of “He is Risen!”

I know not every church has a vigil, and I recognize that this may still feel too contrived for some. But for me, this is the night!

What about you? Do you attend a vigil? What is your favorite Old Testament story and how does it connect with the Jesus story? What has been your favorite church service? Is Easter Sunday a challenge or a joy for you? What helps you connect with the spiritual realities of Jesus’ death & resurrection?
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